Mr Youngman

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Having succeeded in securing his financial future with a string of property ventures, Mr Youngman is turning his attention to helping others get their minds right and achieve amongst other things, the financial and spiritual freedoms he has managed for himself.

Born to Raymond Constantine and Janet Youngman, Ray Jr came into being in Barking, England on the 11th of June 1986. However, this former sparky’s lightbulb moment didn’t happen over night. Instead, as you can imagine, it took years of grafting and resilience in the face of numerous setbacks.

Growing up he would spend a lot of time with his beloved elders, Grandad George and Nanny Mavis, for they were the rocks that held him down. “I spent many of those years enjoying my family time, where I spent it split between my St Lucian side of my family and my mum’s British side...”

Ray’s energy & enthusiasm for life can be traced back to his early childhood. It is perhaps unsurprising then that to this day Ray continues to take great comfort and inspiration from his family. Now married with two children of his own he leads a life he refers to as ALOA or the ‘Authentic Life Of Abundance’.

Kids tend to know how to have fun and young Ray certainly hit the ground running, or should I say dancing. “At 4 I started to enjoy moving to whatever was on. I was the first on the dance floor at all parties and events that my parents brought me to...”

At the same time, Ray found school very challenging and struggled academically. This certainly knocked his confidence during those early years. Young Ray was in need of inspiration and an outlet that reflected his positive energies. Dancing was just that escape and quickly became his preferred form of expression.

With his Dad literally acting as a huge inspiration, being an actor himself; (Red Dwarf and London’s Burning), it was only natural that he would be drawn into that world too.

Soon after showing promise on the dance floor Ray was sent to Harlequins Performing Arts School which he attended until his parents split up leaving his mother no longer able to afford the fees. At the time Ray was devastated, wondering just how he was going to manage to keep doing what he loved.

“Nowadays I carry that energy with me wherever I go, even when I’m in Greg’s queuing for a sausage roll. It’s my most authentic self, non-judgemental of anyone or myself...”

After the break up, it left his mother in a significantly worse financial situation. As a result, tuition fees were the least of their worries. “Debt collectors were regularly at our door asking for my mum or money. I had to hide or say she wasn’t there. It was either that or hand over the last of what we had...”

Then, when his Mother found a new partner they moved in with him but things didn’t quite work out as he had hoped. As soon as he turned 16 Ray felt he had no choice but to leave home to be at peace. Moving serendipitously as it was, on to an estate named Ray Lodge.

Having left home and school behind and with little in the way of options in front of him, Ray began working as a labourer for £25 a Day. “As well as having to quickly get used to 6am starts. I would end up doing all the tough jobs around the site. Those days taught me what hard work was all about...”

“Academics was never my strong point you see, I was always falling behind. Classed as a special needs kid I would get extra help with spelling and maths...” Tell me about it Ray, sign of over-intelligence if you ask me.

“That’s why I would always go back into work as a trainee or apprentice because I thought I wasn’t ever good enough to enter at a higher level...”

21 years old and bouncing from job to job, it wasn’t until Ray became a real estate agent and started meeting successful people that his mind began to open up to what was possible.

He may have only had the job for 6 months but the role was a defining moment in his life. From then on he knew property investment and development was going to be his salvation.

In the meantime, Ray realised he needed to build on his strengths and acquired a trade of his own. By 24 he was a selfemployed electrician, a role that would ultimately lead to the connections and opportunities he was desperately seeking.

Given his wealth of experience, I asked Ray for his best advice. He said; “I have nothing new to tell you. Buy low, add value then sell or rent. Property is my game but really it could be anyone’s...”

Changing the subject completely Ray goes on to say; “I have always been into Zen and am deeply fascinated as to what it must be like to be a Bhuddist monk...”

Such contemplations perhaps explain why he has always been, pardon the pun, star stuck by the night sky. As I can testify, considering ones’ place in the universe always seems to settle the soul, one way or another.

Ironic and contradictory as it may seem, Ray is also equally passionate about his love of luxury and fine living. Who can blame him when his enduring success is clearly matched by an appreciation of what it took to get him there in the first place.

“Since I can remember I’ve always wanted to help others, I just didn’t know how to...” That was until his Grandad George was able to make sense of the world to him in just the way Ray needed to hear.

“George was the old school gentleman, he taught me a hell of a lot, how to smile and have a laugh with it. He also loved a board game and a good stroll around a boot sale...”

Significantly for Ray he would insist any move backwards was still a move forwards. Advice that has certainly held him in good stead. George also stressed the importance of taking care of the client and being willing to go above and beyond.

“When my grandad passed away 5 years ago I realised life is real, real. At that point in time I was at the lowest of the low...”

Just a couple of weeks later, Ray was having a coffee at a clients house when he suddenly had to leave. “I started to feel really ill and began sweating. I realised afterwards that I was having a panic attack. They said you’re suffering from depression. ‘I was like depression, what’s that?’...”

In search of answers and inner peace Ray turned to spiritual mystics like Saghuguru and Alan Watts because as he putsit; “They spoke so much truth. After 6 months or so of searching I realised I had to switch masks from a victim mentality to someone that was willing to run though walls...”

“I realised all this external wealth was not going to fulfil me long term. I had seen many examples and wasn’t willing to neglect that side of me any more. So I was like; How do I adopt a holistic approach to this life that I desire...”

All of Rays finding led him to recognise that we all have a choice. We always have a choice. Once we realise this simple truth, we are only powerless if we choose to be.

Ray now uses this rather straight-forward revelation to achieve his aims in life. He does this principally by reverse engineering his goals, mapping out the steps to his desired outcomes. He then simply ‘chooses’ to join each of those dots until he has accomplished his aims.

Unsurprisingly, as a direct result of his own spiritual evolution he is now acutely aware just how he can help others these days.

His preferred method is known as ‘The Mirror’. Through this process Ray is able work with people to transform their lives from the inside out. “My method shows the individual that how they see the world is ultimately a reflection of what is going on inside...”

Having switched lightbulbs for life coaching, Ray now intends to fuse what he knows best, by one day returning to Ray Lodge and helping the community at large with his method. More significantly, as well as the minds of the people who live there, he would dearly love to revitalise the area as a whole.

“Be it physically or mentally, I want to create environments that inspire the human spirit. Most council estates are built like prisons, from the thick doors to the sounds coming out of the buzzers. It all adds up to create a doom and gloom atmosphere...”

Perhaps the greatest evidence of his success propagating into the world around him can be seen closer to home and how he has been able to both inspire and subsequently empower his own Mum.

At first he was trying to drag her along with him just as he had tried with his kids, his wife and other close friends. He thought his enthusiasm and energy would be enough to convince those around him to think differently about their own possibilities. “I was like come on everybody look at all these things I’m doing, come on you can do it too...”

“Eventually, I stopped doing that and instead became the lighthouse. Instead of instructing everyone, I represent the possibilities. I realised when you work on yourself, the world around you will evolve and enhance. Because they will take your energy and run with it...”

“My mum in particular just surrendered and said; ‘look I can see where you’ve got to, I gave birth to you, I’ve seen what you’ve been through and if you’re doing that then you can certainly help me...”

Ray’s mum, Janet, worked as a science lab technician at Trinity school for over 10 years. “She enjoyed her job and like me worked very hard at it but still wouldn’t challenge herself or put herself in any uncomfortable situations...”

Fast forward to today and Janet now runs her own chiropody business. She has a great income compared to before and isn’t tied down by time, allowing her to spend much more of that precious commodity with her grandchildren. On top of all that she now attends a yoga class with their Mum every Wednesday morning.

“It’s incredible really, all I did is give her some tips and showed her the way. Now she texts me Namaste! Which is fascinating because she was not that before. She was far from Namaste!..”

It’s all a far cry from the days that Janet’s anxiety prevented her from leaving the house, only managing to do so to go to work and little else.

“Now we walk the grounds and we listening to the birds singing and the fish swimming round the pond with no negative vibes within us just feeling at one in the moment, it’s just so beautiful to be able to say that...”

Ray’s journey is truly inspirational on a number of levels. I have to say it has been an honour spend the time with Mr Youngman at his home while he shared his story with me. I eagerly look forward to collaborating with him in the future. In what capacity, well we will have to wait and see, I can only hope I too will be lucky enough to acquire some of his magic dust along the way.